1. I wouldn’t be making that much more money in football, right?
Right?? Right. Right.
2. Would this kids parent be mad at me if I told him he needed to buy some deodorant ASAP?
3. WTF, they just called me Coach Carter…
I’ll take that. He is the Don.
4. Would anybody notice if I finished our session a little early?
5. Is this parent seriously telling me that their child is “very gifted” and it’s hurting the team if he doesn’t start?
Lol. “very gifted”.
6. Will I need to coach on boxing day, or can I cancel training?
I’m going to be SO hungover.
7. Am I just a regular hero, or the greatest hero of all time for giving this kid extra kicking sessions?
8. I wonder what it would be like to lie in on a Sunday…
9. Like, what did this kid’s parents do so right?
10. When this kid plays for his country, will he thank me in his speech?
11. Ok, WHAT do I have to do to get these kids to not drop the ball???
12. How honest should I be when someone asks me how their kid played?
13. How does this kid not know how to tie his shoe lace? He is 9?!
14. Shall I just quit? Is it really worth the effort?!
15. Does this kid need to grow up a bit, or will he always ba a little sh*t?
16. Did those two really think I didn’t see that?
What do you take me for?
17. Is it 74 days till the end of season, or 75?
18. Why am I crying at the EOS when these kids give me so much pain?